Because my retrieval was on a Monday, we are measuring weeks and days starting on Mondays - which is very convenient. Of course, it doesn't make time go any faster, but it's easy to keep track of as it goes creeping by.
At 6w0d, I feel tired. No nausea, no sore boobs. Maybe my boobs have been pregnant too many times (this is #7, including the probable early miscarriages before I knew enough to recognize that my period wasn't just oddly two weeks late). Maybe they've been plumped up and stretched out enough that it doesn't really matter any more? They seem a teensy bit firmer, but alas, not really anything more in terms of cleavage.
I think my daughter suspects. She hasn't said anything outright, and I'm not going to bring it up, but she has remarked, at separate times, that I'm not drinking coffee, that my clothes are all really floppy, that I'm going to a lot of acupuncture and doctors appointments. It was only five months ago that I was fully pregnant, that all those things were completely well-known to be related to that, and that she was asking a million questions about everything.
When we were in Yosemite in December and had to run from the bear (I know you're not supposed to run from a bear, but it's impossible not to) I had grabbed her hand and pulled her through the woods. Afterwards, she said it was fun and I told her that I wasn't supposed to run so fast, so haphazardly, because of the baby. (Yes, I've wondered if that could have been a factor in the demise - I wonder about everything.) And today when we were taking a walk in the hills, she started running down a grassy slope and calling for me to come after her. I told her that I can't run right now. She turned and looked me in the eye and said "Like that time with the bear?"
The problem with high-IQ kids is, well, they can figure things out for themselves. If it weren't summer, if my husband weren't out of town, if her camp hadn't ended last week, then maybe she wouldn't have noticed? But now, after only a few weeks, I know she knows. There is some unspoken agreement that we aren't really saying it out loud, but I think she's just waiting for me to say something first. I've been weighing the options - being openly truthful, ignoring the topic completely, waiting for her to bring it up - but I have no idea what to do. I know she probably just wants reassurance - I do too! - but I'm not sure I can give her much at this point. What would you do?