Friday, September 18, 2009

Officially Whatever

So, I don't know. According to the calendar, I am officially into my second trimester - past the 13w3d mark. Since I'm not sure if the baby is still alive that doesn't really mean anything to me, but I hate to be morbid...

Last time, I rented a fetal doppler and took it to an OB appt. to be sure I was using it properly. The doctor showed me how to use it (seemed simple, really) and that was that. She cautioned me not to get it out every five minutes and said it was best to think of it as occasional reassurance. Which was fine, right?

Except obviously I got it all wrong. I didn't use it very often and I ended up picking up my own abnormally fast heartbeat (side effect of anemia) and was so determined not to be a panicky pregno-chondriac that I just kept naively reassuring myself that all was well.

I wasn't sure if I would rent one at all this time, but as the days go by I know I need something during the wait between appointments. If there is still a heartbeat at my next appointment I'm going to rush straight home and send in my order. I've picked out a fancy hospital-grade model with a digital display, so it won't be as easy to confuse the heart rates. It's cheaper than paying for extra appointments, plus I think my sanity will be well worth it.

It's funny how my original ideas about pregnancy being a natural process and trying to avoid a lot of medical intervention have been eroded to the point that I have set up an account with a hospital supply company. I used to think that having a baby meant signing up for prenatal yoga classes and buying a body pillow. Now, I'd order an u/s machine if I could afford it!

7 comments:

Lost in Space said...

Wishing you peace, hun.

Midlife Mommy said...

I'm glad that you are going to rent the doppler. Peace of mind is priceless. Welcome to the second trimester! Soon, you'll feel movement and can reassure yourself with kick counts (I miss those). I've heard that you feel movement sooner with second pregnancies; I hope that is the case with you. Hugs.

Paula Keller said...

Let this be it! Let this be it! Hoping for you, and wishing you peace and assurance that this will all work out.

Hugs!

May said...

WHAT i love about the doppler is how it makes us all smile.
There is the worry but then the delight.
I wish you that happiness.

Best When Used By said...

Congratulations on arriving at the second trimester! You know I still have my freakout moments (obviously) but the comfort I try to take is in the knowledge that the body systems are now formed. Organs, blood flow, respiration...all the most critical systems are in place. It was a big hurdle. From now on it's about growing and fine tuning.

But, oh yeah, having a doppler close at hand is the best reassurance we have right now between appointments. Good for you. Dopp away!

Lisa DG said...

2nd trimester is a big milestone. I am happy for you and hope that you can find some happiness in the moment.Whatever you need to do to have some serenity, then that is what you need to do.

We're out here routing for you and baby.

Take care of yourself...

DAVs said...

I'm so sorry this is that weird in-between waiting time. Sending you peaceful thoughts and good wishes.